150

That’s how many minutes of sleep I got last night. 150.

neil-gaiman-shrieks-with-glee-o

My kids and husband have noticed a difference in my behavior. For the kids, it means walking soft and doing chores the first time I tell them to.

The husband can be more direct: “You’re getting bitchy.”

giphy2

And we all know what the problem is. I can’t get this chapter written.

disappointed

I’ve made time. I’ve outlined. I’ve talked about it. The husband and kids have left me alone to get it done. But I can’t seem to get through this. Changing the dynamic of these two characters forces changes to their actions and speech.

While nothing changes long-term, story-wise, for them, the short-term changes have me frozen. I hate what I have written so far. It’s contrived and just awful.

i don't like it

And I think I have to let it be awful. For now.

c2627-why

This is the first draft of this chapter. It’s going to be awful. While the rest of this book on version 4.2, this chapter is essentially a beta test. There will be bugs and weird crap, and I’ll figure it out. Next go around.

vodka

I have to accept the crappiness of this chapter, push through it, and move on. Not only so I can finish this book, but so that I can get some frickin sleep.

writing is hard

 

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